case basket

It’s been a tough semester.  Well, it’s been a tough year but this semester especially has been hard.  Even though I’m only taking (almost in the past tense, praise the Lord!) 12 units, all the emotional and physical stress that’s been going on has made it a bit rough.  I feel like such a baby for letting myself get so down and focusing so much on the negative.  But I’ve decided that I’m definitely an emotional masochist.  It’s so much easier to allow myself to droop into a depression than to pull myself up and allow joy to seep into my bones.  On the one hand I feel so much stronger, more confident in who I am and where I’m headed.  But on the other hand this whole emotional trip I’ve put myself on has made me feel so weak and helpless.  And by posting this I’m admitting to that weakness and how much it needs to change.  I want a fresh start, to be revived and renewed, I want 2008 to be my turning point.  But I don’t have to wait for that last digit to change to find my strength.  It is possible for that change to begin right now and that’s what I’m praying for tonight.  I don’t want your pity (no matter what this looks like) but I do covet your prayers.


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